What's that pain?

March 16

 My last post is kind of ironic considering the last week in my life.  I was loving teaching and really getting in the groove of planning/teaching my new first grade class.  I was also excited to be going to a faculty meeting and getting a few extra professional development points towards my re-certification.  I was sitting in the faculty meeting and felt the first pain.  It was on the right side of my back just above my natural waist.  Man did it hurt!  I kinda started to get warm and eventually I had to step out of the meeting.  When I made it home that afternoon I went straight to my bed where the pain quickly escalated for the rest of the afternoon and night.  Ryan made it home and he immediately started to help.  He went out and bought me Tylenol extra strength and a heating pad.  I went ahead and got a sub (for the sub) for the next day knowing that I couldn't teach in my condition. 

March 17

I made it through that night but I decided to go to the doctor on Thursday.  They worked me in, did a couple quick things, and told me I probably had a kidney stone.  I was hit with emotion when they told me that they were going to do an ultrasound to check.  This really hit me hard because my first ultrasound was scheduled for the next Monday and Ryan was planning on going with me to see our Baby.  I was more upset about him not being there than the possibility of a kidney stone.  When they did the ultrasound this is what they found.....

 

What they say is a kidney stone (See the bright white dot)

"Tidbit" Tiller waving at Daddy who wasn't able to be there.

It was such a bittersweet appointment because of the news of the kidney stone and getting to see our beautiful and healthy baby.  The best part of the visit was the decision they made to allow us to come back the following Monday for our original appointment so that Ryan could experience the ultrasound with me.  I was so thankful.  Keep in mind I was still in pain.  The doctor told me that I needed to be drinking at least 64 ounces of water a day and if the pain got unbearable to go the hospital.

March 18

At 3:00 am I woke up in pain.  Ryan decided by 4:00 am that we were going to the hospital.  I agreed.  Once there we didn't have to wait long before being seen by a doctor.  They gave me a big shot in my hip which really hurt and within five minutes I felt uncontrollably drowsy.  That is the only way to describe it.  They also monitored me for a little while, wrote me a prescription for pain medication, and then sent me home.  My mom was taking the day off work to stay home with me so Ryan took me and dropped me off at my parents house.  I think he stuck around for a while but I don't remember anything about that day until about 3:00 pm.  That shot really knocked me out.  The pain meds started to kick in and help the pain but they also made me very sick to my stomach.  The events of that day included sleeping, trying to drink fluids and eat, and getting sick.  Ryan came and spent the night there with me at my parents.  I slept through that night without waking up from pain!  

March 19-20

We went to the lake for a change of scenery.  Remember that at this point I was waiting to pass a kidney stone and hoping it would come soon.  So, I figured it didn't matter where that happened.  Sunday rolled around and still no change.  One thing that happened over the weekend was that I realized that taking a bath allowed me to relax and eased the pain.

March 21

I was really looking forward to this day because Ryan and I were going back to the doctor for our ultrasound.  I woke up feeling good.  I took a shower and rushed out the door to get there on time.  I had a tervis tumbler of water (trying to get my 64 ounces off to a good start for the day) and a few peanut butter crackers on my stomach along with my pain pill.  I felt fine in the waiting room but as we waited the pain and nausea started to increase.  We had the ultrasound which was wonderful!  Our baby was moving around, stretching its long legs, and opening and closing its mouth.  It was a great experience except for the pain.  They also did an ultrasound on my kidney and found that the stone hadn't moved since last Thursday.  I got sick and ended up throwing up two times while I was there.  I was so bad off that the doctor went ahead and made an appointment for me to see a urologist that afternoon.  They even rolled me out in a wheel chair to the car.  I got sick once on the way home....poor Ryan.  Once at home I took a bath to try to ease the pain.  That just caused me to get overheated and faint feeling.  I got out of the bath and finally got control of myself.  Ryan's mom came over and helped out so much.  She went to have a prescription filled and brought me a lemon pie from Chick-fil-a.  I barely started feeling good again before it was time to load up and go see the urologist.  Ryan, my mom, and Donna all went with me.  At that point I was so glad to have the support.  The urologist was interesting....you can ask me about that experience in person if you want to know the details.  When we made it into the conference room to hear from the doctor we basically got this message........The bottom line here is that I can't trust an ultrasound to tell me if you have a kidney stone.  We can't do any other tests to see if you do have a kidney stone. 85% of the time the pain you are experiencing comes from uterine ligament stretching which can be "debilitating" for pregnant women and may last the duration of your pregnancy.  STOP taking all meds right now.  They are not safe for your baby.  TOUGH IT OUT.

Did I just hear him correctly?  This pain might last until delivery?  I just have to TOUGH IT OUT?  I walked away from that appointment realizing that I couldn't put my trust in doctors to heal....I COULD ONLY TRUST IN THE LORD TO BE MY HEALER!

I went off the pain meds that day.  Tuesday I took five baths and stayed on the heating pad almost all day.  Wednesday my mom and Gina came to stay with me while Ryan was a work.  I took two baths that day to ease the pain.  Wednesday I didn't have to take one bath.  I just used the heating pad a few times and had very minimal movement.  Thursday and Friday I was able to get out the house and walk around without feeling any pain.  Saturday, which is today, I have again felt no pain!  PRAISE THE LORD!  

I realize that the pain could return at any moment but I am trusting in the Lord through all of this.  I know that he goes before us and that he will carry me through whatever struggle he wants me to go through.  It will all be for his glory.  And don't forget that he is forming this most precious life inside of me!  He is going to take care of us!  I have such peace knowing I am loved by my Savior.  I gave up the long term substitute position, knowing that I needed to take care of myself and avoid any setbacks.  Everyone up at the school was wonderful and I felt their prayers for me.  

Thank you to everyone who has prayed for me throughout the past week. 

My bottom line:  I may not know the source of the pain, but I know the source of my healing.  Jesus!  Jesus!  Jesus!

teaching + pregnant = exhausted

Dear pregnant teachers.....I have a new respect for you!

Many of you know that I taught second grade for three years at Taylors Elementary.  Those three years of teaching were wonderful and I never imagined that my life would change so much after three short years.  I was/am passionate about teaching and I know that it is a calling in my life.  I find so much joy in working with young children and making a difference in their life.  It truly energizes me to see them grow so much in a matter of months!  SO, when Ryan and I started dating and became engaged (in a matter of months) my world was turned upside down.  I knew that I would be moving from Greer to Fountain Inn.  I have to confess that I am not a morning person.  This is relevant because even after three years of waking up at the crack of dawn, I still didn't enjoy waking up really early to be at school.  FI is between 40 and 45 minutes from my old school and I immediately started to dread that daily commute.  Also, we knew that we would be trying to start a family in a year or so (didn't quite make it a year!)  and I didn't want to transfer to a new school and only be there for one year.  So, after much prayer and a lot of encouragement from Ryan, family, and friends I resigned.........I still pinch myself sometimes and ask, "After all that school you really just quit?"  But I did.

Some of you (katie baggott)  will laugh as you read this b/c it is turning into a novel!  The last paragraph was all to lead up to the fact that I have been substitute teaching this year.  I am have really enjoyed it over all.  I started the year off with a long term sub for about 8 weeks.  That really helped b/c I was sad about not having a class of my own to prepare for at that point.  But, as that job finished up I was very glad to have the flexibility of subbing!  I have worked a lot this year and have been able to be in numerous classrooms and gain lots of new ideas just from observation.  A week and a half ago I started another long term sub position in a first grade class.  I will be there for six weeks for sure.....it could be longer but I haven't been told that yet.  The class I am teaching is really fun!  I can tell that their teacher did a great job training them in classroom procedures and I am very thankful!

I am 11 weeks pregnant and I was nervous about the combination of teaching everyday and feeling sick.  But I really can't complain about how it is going so far.  My best part of the day is always in the morning when I feel more rested.  I just have to make sure that I eat a good breakfast and have good snacks to munch on throughout the day.  I feel my worst from about 5:00 onward.  Last week there was one night I went to bed at 7:30.  It felt so good!

The worst moment so far:  The second day of this long term sub we went on a field trip.  I sat in the front seat of the bus but that really didn't help.  I still felt sick as we made our way up to the top of Roper Mountain.  Then we went to the planetarium where we watched the most dizzying movie for an hour.  I had my eyes closed most of the time!  I couldn't handle it!  Yuck!

My best moment so far:  Last week the class worked on writing stories about an animal who had a problem and solved it.  At first they weren't really excited but after some fun brainstorming they came up with some really good stories!

I am not under the pressure that a regular classroom teacher is under.  I don't have to worry about being evaluated or end of the year testing.  So, I don't truly know what it would be like to be working the rest of the year pregnant, but I am definitely impressed by all the teachers that do it everyday.  I only have a matter of weeks were I will be teaching full time.  Having an end in sight (other than June) changes everything about my perspective.  I can definitely do it and do it well!  Hats off to all the teachers that spend their whole pregnancy teaching!